Abandoned Project: Swords of the Nine Isles June 29, 2007
Posted by Wade Rockett in Writing.Tags: Abandoned Projects
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Flashing blades! Sorcery most foul!
The Project
Remember how I was trying to write something marketable? I thought I might be on to something with this fantasy novel set in a sea kingdom of nine tropical islands. I was trying for a mysterious, shadowy setting reminiscent of Fritz Leiber’s Lankhmar stories. The main characters were a sorceress and her swordsman companion, who went off on missions at the behest of the sorceress’ clan. We join them as a mission goes spectacularly wrong: a routine beatdown of a corrupt merchant turns into a confrontation with an undead enemy that hasn’t been seen in the world for decades.
Honestly, I can’t remember what I thought would happen from there. But I wrote a kick ass opening fight scene.
Why it was abandoned
I had world-building problems. Again, the crazy need for everything to be perfect before I started writing undid me. The geography, the culture, the clan structure, the political situation, everything had to be mapped out fully before I could start swinging swords around. Which I guess is fine except that I couldn’t settle on any one scheme of things. I kept fiddling with the world, changing things.
A big problem was that I knew that whatever world I came up with was fake. I couldn’t know whether it would be convincing to a reader because I knew just how full of holes it actually was. Maybe this is a way in which someone who tries to write fantasy finds himself playing King of the Hill with Tolkien. For example, when Tolkien named his characters, those names had a fully developed cultural and linguistic context. I was giving characters names that seemed cool and hoping that they sort of sounded like they might belong to people who lived in the same place. Dur! I is write a novels!
After a while I got bored with fiddling and set my incomplete Tinkertoy world aside. Which is a shame, because now and then I caught glimpses of a place that I would really like to visit, and maybe readers would, too.
Well, who knows? Maybe I’ll find a way there yet.
And that, ladies and gents, wraps up Abandoned Projects Week. Thanks for coming!
Abandoned Project: The Key of Worlds June 28, 2007
Posted by Wade Rockett in Writing.Tags: Abandoned Projects
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Behold the whiteness of the Whale!
The Project:
The Key of Worlds (sometimes titled The Key of Dreams) was to be a modern fantasy novel, something like a James Blaylock book. It began with some notes jotted down in the late 90s about a young man who stumbles into a dreamlike world when he turns corners, pulls certain books from library shelves, etc. And there was an idea of something hidden in the ancient Library of Alexandria that was so important, the Library was burned down just to provide a distraction while it was smuggled out.
In its most coherent form, KoW was a story about a young man who inherits his late grandfather’s house, located in a strange neighborhood with a large population of eccentric old people. His grandfather possessed (or was himself) the object of a power struggle among these eccentric old people, something called the Key of Worlds.
The main characters try to find out what and where the Key of Worlds is and what it’s for without leading the wrong people to it, whoever they are. In the process they uncover a secret history of this community that’s full of shame and horror and deep wounds that need healing. They also learn a secret history of the twentieth century involving bizarre experiments in psychic research by Naval intelligence that tie into the secrets of this little neighborhood.
In the end, the good guys win.
Why it was abandoned
You ever see Wonder Boys, or read the novel by Michael Chabon? This was my Grady Tripp moment.
I’d just come off writing a first novel that was making the rounds at the publishers. A few people were pretty excited about it, but were anxious to know what I was going to do next. Could I be counted on to consistently deliver quality product? Or was this the only book I had in me?
I’d succeeded in finishing the first novel because it was fun to write. Now I had to create something “marketable.” I had no idea how to successfully complete a marketable novel, only one that was fun to write. The result was creative paralysis.
I coped with my paralysis by substituting planning for actual writing. I wrote mountains of notes: plot outlines, character studies, lists of people, places, and things and how they related to one another, all of them changing constantly as better ideas came to me. I wrote a history of the Bryce family from the late 1800s to the present day. Every time I moved I changed the location to whatever part of the country I’d moved to, which changed the mood of the piece, and the characters’ biographies…
All I had to do was make it perfect, you see.
Pretty much any of the later versions of the story would have made a fine novel. (The villain remains for me a tremendously compelling character.) But I couldn’t stop working on the book and start writing it.
Eventually the endless and unproductive struggle for perfection left me burned out. I filed the notes away and stopped thinking about the project altogether.
Along the way I learned that I find old folks more interesting to write about than young folks. Old characters have a long history that they need to come to terms with. They have complex relationships, and the sobering knowledge that this might be their last chance ever to put things right.
Abandoned Project: Yesterday’s post June 28, 2007
Posted by Wade Rockett in Life.add a comment
WordPress was doing some database maintenance yesterday and I wasn’t able to post. Not that it matters much, because what I was going to write was that I was sick, and wouldn’t be posting.
Still sick. Feh.
I took advantage of my sick day to finally watch Top Gun for the first time ever. At last I’m free from the wide-eyed astonishment of friends and co-workers when I tell them that I am unfamiliar with the high-speed aerial antics of Maverick, Iceman, Prancer, Sneezy, and Alfalfa.
The move was kinda stupid, but fun. Also totally gay.
Abandoned Project: My Life On Earth Prime June 26, 2007
Posted by Wade Rockett in Geek, Writing.Tags: Abandoned Projects
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Abandoned novels? I got a million of ‘em!

The Project
My Life On Earth Prime* was to be a hilarious yet touching coming of age story. The main character and his friends were high school nerds who passed the time reading comic books, playing Dungeons and Dragons, and arguing about whether Robert Heinlein could beat Robert Silverberg in a fight. Or something.
As the story progressed, they, ah…
Uh…
Why it was abandoned
That’s all there was to it. I had no story, or characters with any real depth - just a bunch of geeky pop culture references and generic high school situations. Mind you, one could write an enjoyable piece of fiction that meets that description, but I couldn’t shake the conviction that this novel had to be Profound and Meaningful. It turned out that I had nothing profound or meaningful to say on the subject, so I hung it up.
* See Earth Prime (Flash: Those Who Ride The Lightning)
Podcast project checklist June 25, 2007
Posted by Wade Rockett in Podcasting.2 comments
Registered the domain name.
Interviewed JG, edited the audio.
Invited:
- SB
- WB
- ZM
Acquired permissions for music.
- Edited to create intro, outro, transitions.
To do:
- Record non-interview portions of first show.
- Open checking account for podcast and Web stuff.
- Set up Web hosting at GoDaddy.
- Sign up for AdSense.
- Upload WordPress, Blixkreig theme, and plugins, and build the site.
- Decide: host the files on LibSyn, or at my site?
- Set up Feedburner feed.
- Invite more guests. (Goal: have at least three shows in the buffer.)
- Learn more, more, more.
Abandoned Project: my 1987 rap album June 25, 2007
Posted by Wade Rockett in Music.Tags: 1980s, Abandoned Projects, Corey Haim
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Welcome to Abandoned Projects Week! I was going to post about fairly recent projects that I might conceivably still feel responsible for, but this one is such a classic that I couldn’t resist.
Forward into the past!
The Project
Yeahhh boy-ee! It’s the summer of 1987, and I am so down with the hip hop that I’m bustin’ out rhymes like Capone doin’ crimes! Which is to say that I am writing rap lyrics and occasionally inflicting them on friends. A germ of an idea forms: maybe I could record my own rap album.
I realized at the time what a ridiculous idea it was. But that was exactly what appealed to me. I love stupid, grandiose projects. When I heard that some college students were translating the Bible into Klingon I thought, “Of course! Why wouldn’t you translate the Bible into Klingon?”
Why it was abandoned
It turned out that recording studios were expensive. And they were run by people who might make me feel like a real idiot for doing this. And what would I do about backing tracks? Would I have to become my own DJ, too?
Also, what on earth was I going to do with the (no doubt terrible) finished product?
I came to my senses and spent the summer hanging out at the 7-11, playing Bubble Bobble and eating Klondike bars.
Now, 20 years later, the situation would be completely different. Book time at a recording studio? Pfft. I would just open GarageBand on my iBook, call up some beats, and lay down a few tracks. Then I’d create a MySpace page and upload the results.
Hell, it would probably attract fans nowadays. Strange, sad, wrong fans, but fans nonetheless.
Next week will be Abandoned Projects Week June 21, 2007
Posted by Wade Rockett in Life.add a comment
A recent post on 43 Folders described Jason DeFillippo’s 90-day program to clean up his act before he turns 36.
On July 6, I turn 40 years old. I don’t have nearly enough time to clean up my act (I’d need about 20 years for that), but maybe I can join the ranks of the indisputably middle-aged with something of an attitude adjustment. Perhaps I can scrape away a few things that have clung to my mind like barnacles for the past couple of decades.
To that end, I am declaring next week Abandoned Projects Week on Rockett Science. Each day I will post about a project that I started and never finished, but which still hangs around on my hard drive and in some tiny corner of my brain under the category “Something I’m officially still working on, except I’m not and never will be.”
Thus shall I exorcise these sad ghosts by naming them.
Boing Boing outraged at library’s decision not to teach divination and pseudoscience June 20, 2007
Posted by Wade Rockett in Intarweb.1 comment so far
This post on Boing Boing seems a little weird to me. Its bloggers normally tend to come out in favor of science, rationalism, logic, etc. against beliefs and practices that they perceive as superstitious and irrational.And yet, we’re clearly meant to be outraged that threats of picketing forced a public library to cancel its summer program of teaching kids astrology, palmistry, numerology, and tarot card reading.
Maybe the library will have to go to Plan B, and expose the kids to science, art, and literature this summer.
(In the original piece there’s also an allusion to a bomb threat. But in context it’s not clear that this was one of the threats that was actually made, or if it’s meant to illustrate how seriously the library takes children’s safety. If there was a real bomb threat, no mention is made of the police being involved.)
PROBABLY! June 20, 2007
Posted by Wade Rockett in Intarweb.add a comment

Facebook user Michael Manuel understands that you can’t just rush into removing pointless, space wasting, bullshit applications from your social network profile.










