This routine is getting really old. Especially the part where they deny being gay afterward. At least Ted Haggard mixed it up a bit by admitting that he was gay, but promising to stop being gay.
Here’s what we do:
Get all the anti-gay Republicans together and give them each a marble. Put out a big barrel.
Say, “Let’s all close our eyes for ten minutes. While they’re closed, anyone who’s had gay sex, drop your marble in the barrel.”
After all the marbles have been dropped, we open our eyes and count the marbles.
“Look,” we can say. “This proves that several hundred* of you are secretly having gay sex. There’s no need to pretend otherwise anymore. Now can we start to talk honestly about homosexuality?”